I vividly remember finding out that I was pregnant with both of my children. The shock/excitement/fear/elation of a positive pregnancy test, that magic sound of baby’s first heartbeat. In that time gap between discovering that our family was growing until being able to observe the baby via ultrasound, I briefly considered – what if there should happen to be two heartbeats instead of one? That utterly overwhelming (and slightly terrifying) bit of anxiety was laid to rest when it turned out that indeed both of my pregnancies were singletons. However, I had the chance to sit down with Jacqui, a mom of twins (who graciously lent their adorable faces and natural modeling talent to The Elephant Organics) and ask her what being a mom of multiples was really like.
Upon first meeting Jacqui, you cannot help but be drawn to her. She has a contagious laugh, a sweet disposition, and an effervescent spirit that is downright magnetic. The first time that I met her, she had both of her daughters, T & S, in tow. T was sitting pleasantly in her stroller, smiling up with a mouth adorably dotted with tiny nubs of baby teeth with wide, inquisitive eyes. S was toddling along with the determined consternation of a brand-new walker, just discovering the pleasures of self-mobility as a biped. Jacqui was confidently managing the needs of both girls, fishing out a snack for T, up-righting S when she stumbled.
In addition to being a superb mother, Jacqui also holds multiple certifications in social work, and has her own company, Weissman Wellness Geriatric Care Management. Whew! She might be Superwoman – but she was surprisingly modest, incredibly friendly, and refreshingly candid in her responses to my questions.
Me: Did you ever consider what it would be like being a mom of twins before you found out you were expecting the girls?
Jacqui: I had never imagined my life with twins. Pre-babies, I was living in Brooklyn, running a company and living life with no real worries or cares beyond what was fun and worked in my own personal life and marriage. When my husband and I decided to have children, I had imagined slinging one kid on my hip and going – you know – going on with my life, but with a baby. All of that changed the minute we found out we were having twins… in a pandemic.
Me: How did you find out you were expecting twins? How did you feel when you found out?
Jacqui: I was excited, but terrified. There are so many unknowns during pregnancy, and despite being in my late 30s, I knew nothing about babies. It was scary to think that I would have to figure that out, double time.
Me: How did you tell your husband that you were going to have twins?
Jacqui: We found out together. There was always the possibility of this, as we did IVF, which increases that possibility, but hearing those words, “look, two babies” and “look, two heartbeats,” will always be shocking. Even now, 15 months in, I am still flabbergasted.
Me: Was there anything special that you did to prepare for welcoming your two babies?
Jacqui: I was four months pregnant the world whet into lock down, which made for a unique experience. We prepared by making the massive decision to move out of our beloved Brooklyn home and into a new home on Long Island. This decision was heavily influenced by the need for space due to the twins, and all of the pandemic uncertainty. Outside of that, we prepared the nurseries and I made an effort to connect with other twin moms to learn about experiences and gather as much advice from those who have been there as I could. Things like the most helpful items for twin moms to lighten the load were extremely helpful and information I wouldn’t have had without other twin mom’s help. My friends joked that all twin moms are in a club – it turned out to be true!
Me: What was the first week like at home after you gave birth?
Jacqui: The first week was a blur. A beautiful disaster, really. Bottles, boobs, bassinets. It was an exercise in winging it and enjoying the chaos.
Me: What are your top three pieces of advice for moms who are expecting multiples?
Jacqui: My advice for moms expecting twins:
- Take it slow! Everything takes 4x as long with 2
- Embrace the chaos. There is no perfect, and your babies will cry – no, your babies will scream – that’s ok!
- Don’t be afraid to accept help, or to just say no. It’s ok to not attend that dinner, to say no to visitors, and it’s perfectly acceptable to never shower again (half kidding on that one).
Great advice for any expectant mom expecting one, two, or even more babies!
If you are interested in learning more tips about caring for twins, or products that Jacqui says have been helpful in her journey, here are some links that she recommends checking out:
Lucie’s List (for reviews of all items- focused on safety)
Table for Two Twin Feeder (makes those late night bottle feedings so much easier and takes half the time)
Baby Brezza (Your kids own little instant coffee maker)
